Supafly
Retired Mod
Do not walk before me, for I will not follow. Do not walk behind me, for I dare not lead. Do not walk beside me, either: just take a damn hint and f*ck off
What is the sound of two hands masturbating?
Never criticize a man until you have walked a mile in his shoes. That way, you're a mile away, and you have his shoes
If a tree falls in the forest and no one is there to hear it, do all the other trees laugh?
Man who stand on toilet high on pot
He who go to bed with itchy butt often wake up with smelly finger
* Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
* A day without sunshine is like, night.
* On the other hand, you have different fingers.
* I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
* 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
* 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
* I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
* Honk if you love peace and quiet.
* Remember, half the people you know are below average.
* He who laughs last thinks slowest.
* Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
* I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
* Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7 of your week.
* A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
* Get a new car for your spouse. It'll be a great trade!
* Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.
* Always try to be modest, and be proud of it!
* OK, so what's the speed of dark?
* How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
* If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
* When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
* Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
* If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
* Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
* I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.
* I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
* Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened.
***********************************
The wise Zen Master is visiting New York one day from Tibet. He goes up to a local hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything."
The hot dog vendor fixes him a delicious hot dog and hands it to the Zen Master, who proceeds to pay with a $20 bill.
The vendor puts the bill in the cash box and closes it.
"Where's my change?" asks the Zen Master.
The vendor responds, "Change must come from within."
:yoda:
What is the sound of two hands masturbating?
Never criticize a man until you have walked a mile in his shoes. That way, you're a mile away, and you have his shoes
If a tree falls in the forest and no one is there to hear it, do all the other trees laugh?
Man who stand on toilet high on pot
He who go to bed with itchy butt often wake up with smelly finger
* Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
* A day without sunshine is like, night.
* On the other hand, you have different fingers.
* I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
* 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
* 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
* I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
* Honk if you love peace and quiet.
* Remember, half the people you know are below average.
* He who laughs last thinks slowest.
* Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
* I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.
* Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7 of your week.
* A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
* Get a new car for your spouse. It'll be a great trade!
* Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.
* Always try to be modest, and be proud of it!
* OK, so what's the speed of dark?
* How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
* If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
* When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
* Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
* If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
* Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
* I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.
* I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
* Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened.
***********************************
The wise Zen Master is visiting New York one day from Tibet. He goes up to a local hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything."
The hot dog vendor fixes him a delicious hot dog and hands it to the Zen Master, who proceeds to pay with a $20 bill.
The vendor puts the bill in the cash box and closes it.
"Where's my change?" asks the Zen Master.
The vendor responds, "Change must come from within."
:yoda:
